Okay. Once again, a million apologies for the radio silence this month; I’ve been a Bad Alle, and I do solemnly swear NOT to do it again. Life has been…well, it’s not been especially complicated or difficult; it’s just been odd in unexpected ways. Things I never thought would bug me have been bugging me, and things I never thought would stop hurting have stopped hurting. My brother said to me last week “You either care about something or you don’t” and I think I’ve just switched a lot of things into the latter category.
BUT. Enough of that stuff, because do you know what last Friday was? Thaaaaat’s right, it was my birthday. I’m now 25, so come here and give grandma a kiss!
During the day, I went and had birthday fun with Erika, a True Lady if ever there was one. We enjoyed vegan icecream–I’d never had it before, it was delicious–and generally had a great time as she tried to convince me to stretch my earlobes (NOTE TO MY MOTHER BEFORE SHE TEARS HER HAIR OUT: Haven’t done it, still too scared). Erika is one of my favourite people and I am incredibly sad that she’s leaving Chicago at the end of the month. She’s going to be piercing at Splash of Color in Lansing, so if you want to get pierced by the VERY VERY BEST and you’re in the area, you should go see her. And give her a hug from me because I’m going to miss her.
That night, it was party time. But, uh, I kind of didn’t plan my party ahead of time, so it seemed like I was going to be sitting alone at a bar, drinking until I couldn’t feel feelings. My mistake! I had the best night ever!
My Hollywood Husband Matt (explanation another day, I promise) was waiting for me at Flatiron! Now, for those of you who aren’t Chicago (or Wicker Park) savvy, I should explain why this photo is funny: Flatiron is a shots-of-whiskey and PBR type of bar. It is NOT a “fancy drink” place. So when Matt told the poor bartender to make me exactly that, a “fancy drink,” I had to laugh. I didn’t even think they HAD martini glasses there!
Frankly, I’m a vodka-tonic sort of girl, and this thing was a bit too…something…for my taste. But I drank it anyway, because Matt was so full of special birthday feelings. This is a photo of those special feelings.
Cait, aka: my first wife, drove out from the suburbs to hang out for my birthday. Unfortunately, the combination of Damen, Milwaukee and North and my shitty directions proved too much for her, and I had to send Matt out to find her. He, however, got distracted by a cigarette and forgot, so Cait had to look for him. It all shook out alright in the end, though.
Erika, Cait and THE BIRTHDAY GIRL, who is now drinking vodka tonics, thankyouverymuch. My head looks really huge and Cait looks a little special in this picture, but I like it.
My Wondertwin Charlotte (who you may remember from “Fucking shit up” back in May) came, and was–prepare yourself for this–ONLY TWENTY MINUTES LATE. Charlotte is wonderful at a lot of things but being on time isn’t one of them, so to say that I was impressed is an understatement. I was really, really happy that she came.
Here’s Blake and I mean muggin’ one another. Don’t be alarmed; this is how we show affection. Blake was also full of special birthday feelings all night; he kept giving me big brotherly advice about subjects as diverse as dudes, music and my personality. Examples: “You need a guy who’s real confident, a real asshole, who’ll keep you in line. Else you’ll just run all over him” “Alle, you’re a bitch and a jerk, but you’re a sweetheart, and that’s why I love you.” Loves you too, Blake!
I had the honour of going along on what turned out to be Char and Blake’s first date; we called it “The Tri-Date” and explained that since Char and I have already dated so many of the same dudes, it makes sense that we’d just cut out the middleman and date them together. See? And you thought that explanation would be weird.
True Ladies, every one of us. And True Ladies use jazz hands. It’s a fact.
This is about the only picture you need to see to get a feel for the tone of the night: me, making weird faces and bubbling over with happiness and love while everyone else looks on, bemused.
Erika and I were dramatically performing the opening to “It’s Raining Men” right before this photo was taken. “Hi.” “HI!” “we’re YOUR weathergirls.” “MM-HMM.” “And have we got news for you!” “You better listen!”
Cait has always been a little…uncomfortable at the disparity between our heights. At 5’10”, I tower over her even in flats, and in five inch heels–which I was wearing at my party–she ends up eye-level with my boobs. I know, I know; but she insists she doesn’t like it. Anyway, this photo was taken when she jumped up on the radiator and was suddenly taller than me! For the first time ever! EEEEK!
Here’s Blake and I being totally metal outside on a smokebreak (I don’t smoke, but I like to feel included). Blake inspected the photo and said “Yeah man. Totally grim.” I told him that we could look grimmer, but we didn’t test that hypothesis.
Here’s Matt and Will, deep in their bromance. Matt has had a mancrush on Will since they met almost three years ago; I’m so glad to see that it continues to this day!
I was about thirteen drinks into my night when someone tapped me on the shoulder. “Alle? Remember me?” said the gorgeous girl. It took me a minute, but YES, I REMEMBER! This is Malissa, who I haven’t seen in ALMOST FOUR YEARS. Talk about a strange coincidence of time and space! We squealed and spazzed, and I sucked her into my party. Sorry, whoever else she was there to meet!
Okay, let’s be real: I don’t actually remember taking this picture. When I saw it, I said “Wait a second…I was drinking PBR?” I don’t usually drink beer when I’m out–that’s a home thing–so maybe it was an evil robot Alle? Malissa poked holes in that theory, telling me that after taking this I looked at the photo and said “MY BANGS LOOK AMAZING.” So, uh, I guess it really was me. Surprise!
Taters and Matt. Cait’s double-fisting drinks and Matt is showing why we called him “Music Matt” back in the day.
Hey, I’m 25 now. Practically an old lady. And to be an old lady, I need some seriously awesome, tacky, CRAMAZING jewelery!
So as you can see, I had world’s best birthday because I have world’s best friends. And I woke up with world’s best hangover. Whatever. Totally worth it! I wouldn’t change anything for the world.
So far I’m loving being 25. Being 24 kind of sucked, so any kind of change is for the better as far as I’m concerned. Things have changed so much for me between last birthday and this; I can’t wait to see what next year’s birthday brings.
Loves you! I promise to be better with updates.